Through my dealings and interactions with deferent sects, races and sexes of people I couldn’t help but notice how much value people attach to words and names. Far too much meaning and emotions are linked to just a string of letters. I remember as a child being taught manners from my parents. You can't get anything without saying the appropriate words to match your request. Whenever you wanted something you always had to say please. I could never refer to my parents or older people on a first name basis. You always had to say mom, dad, uncle, granddad etc. When someone sneezed, you have to say bless you. The funny thing is it doesn’t matter whether you mean it or not. You just have to say them because it’s the set standard by which you were raised on and nobody really knows why these protocols are so necessary.
When someone calls you a kaffir, nigger, bushy, coolie you get really angry and throw a tantrum because you feel offended by these mere words. What I find most interesting is how the meaning of words and language in general is always evolving and won’t always mean the same thing to different things through time and various generations. This is evident with curse words in particular. Forty years ago you couldn’t dream of saying fuck you in public let alone on TV. Nowadays it comes standard with any TV show and only a minority cringes at the mention of the word fuck lately. The term nigger is traditionally a racist word to American black people but has become a term of endearment and belonging to black people all over the world but somehow still racist slander when said by anyone without brown skin. Why is that?
Have you ever considered why you get so mad when someone outside your racial group calls you a nigger, kaffir, coolie, boer or bushy? Even when that person doesn’t mean it in a demeaning manner you can’t help but cringe at the thought of it. Its not that you really find it offensive. Its that you were taught to find it offensive. There was a point in your life where such words didn’t even exist in your vocabulary and if anyone outside of your racial group were to call you a kaffir you wouldn’t even know it was an insult. I found out recently that kaffir is an Arabic word for people that don’t believe in neither Islam, Hinduism and Christianity. It’s a word the settlers used to describe people that didn’t subscribe to the major western religions. Over time it became more and more of a derogatory term and was associated with feelings of hate and animosity. Don’t get me wrong, I completely understand why people get angry and throw fits when confronted with racial slurs. Given the world’s very recent and horrific racial segregation and brutality it’s only rational that racial animosity is still very ripe. I just think people get too caught up in identifying themselves with just mere words.
Consider this: The word coloured is a standard term used to describe the mixed races within the SADC region in Africa while in most parts of the world you wouldn’t even dream of using such a term while maintaining a bruise and scar-free body. And yet in southern Africa you not just describing a race but referring to a whole culture of people proud to be called coloureds. I dare you to go to Eldorado Park, Westbury or even the Cape Flats and start calling people “mixed race” and see if you’ll make it out in one piece. The term coloured is not limited to just the colour of skin. It identifies an entire culture of people. Having a white father and black mother does not qualify you as a coloured. You have to live the life and be part of the culture to be considered coloured.
This brings me back to my original question. What’s in a name? That if a rose was called by any other name would it not smell as sweet? I guess I wasn’t completely wrong in using this line to defend myself when I forgot a ladies name. What’s in a name? Names and words are just a points of reference. Just a way to let the people you are talking to know exactly what you are referring to. Words and names are just tools used in language to point out people and things in general. Do you not know who you are? Are you a non-believer? Are you a kaffir? Are you a coolie? Are you a bushy?
That’s where the problem lies. We live in a society where we don’t know who we are but are told who we are and who we should identify with. You are taught how to behave and how to react to such words and situations. It has nothing to do with who you are. You can never control what people feel and think about you. The person who truly believes you a no-good, lazy, criminal nigger is far worse than the one who said it reciting a rap song. You need to dig deep and find out who you are and be content with it rather than letting people decide who you are and get angry when challenged on it. I ask again: What’s in a name? Nothing but a string of letters
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